Bubba

A moment of peace whilst the siblings nap.

All 3

More of the Bub with siblings

6 days later

Looking back, I'd do it again - only just because he's such darling.
But never again here. Shoot me if I forget.
My obstetrician's bedside manners will never leave me.

As he walked into the birthing room, and in spite of the pain, I greeted him with a 'hi'. He replied with "Are you ready to push?". He asked the same question (and glared the nurse into asking the same question) no fewer than 4 times in the span of 4-5 minutes. Contractions were coming fast and furious - every minute to be precise.

When I finally caved in (from peer pressure - nurse and obstetrician combined) , I honestly hadn't fathomed that just flipping over from my foetal position and splaying myself would be that difficult! So I got the, "Look at me. LOOK. AT. ME. What you're doing, you will only break your husband's hand. If you want the pain to go away, then stop concentrating your energies in your legs blah blah blah. RELAX your legs, blah blah blah and stop the screaming. Push like you're having a big bowel movement and get the baby out. "

He barked at both the nurse and the husband. They apparently weren't holding my legs down properly.

After it all, he says calmly, "You need sutures." then walks off to get the equipment! You woulda thought they'd be prepared since they prefer not to give episiotomies. But no. And I could feel every stitch, mind you.

Anyway, I can just about walk and sit today so, that's good. Ever sat in a sitz bath for 5 days running? Ever not been able to sit at all to eat, to nurse, to drink, to read, to watch tv, just to rest? It's just ridiculous really, all this suffering when a routine epidural, a neat episiotomy and decent painkillers would have done the job nicely and rather painlessly even after the event. Pfft.

The ass is aching again so gotta go.

Born on 9 Nov 2006

DID IT.
6 pushes in 6 minutes flat.

All's well.

No, they refused me epidural.

So have been battered, sore and in frustrating discomfort the past 4 days.

Am in high spirits today and can safely say I love him to bits already.

All mine. All ours. The best Christmas gift ever, I think.

Riled

Some boy took my son down in the park today and scratched his face. It was apparently completely unprovoked.

The teacher said she gave him many hugs to calm him down.

My Man said he was so angry, the teacher asked him to punch her instead.

I was a picture of the perfectly calm being. Very unmotherly-like. Alsolutely civil and understanding. Almost a saint. Of course I insisted the boy's parents be alerted to it and that it never recurs. But it was a very controlled conversation with my then, very vulnerable son in my arms.

Back home, my husband got an earful. Of how I would get my hands on that brat and wring his neck, and smash his face in the mud, and stomp on those vicious tiny hands so bad they'd bleed....

My husband could think of doing worse...but that's just us fantasising.

My Man understands the situation as "Perhaps he has a nasty big brother at home who does nasty things to him and so he's an angry boy. And angry boys act naughty in school. I think he's just unhappy. Your scratch will heal, look, it's already scabby. You're tough. It's all ok."

Right under this calm veneer is a riled woman. So riled I'd take him out of that school in a split second, sue the pants outta those lousy teachers, put the boy behind bars (his parents and for that matter, his entire chope clan included), burn their only house to cinders, nothing less....and much more. But that's just me. That's just insane.

It's so hard to raise good, kind, loving, happy children. If he ever reads this, he too would grow up to be just like me? Nothing extremely wrong with that, I guess....is there? I honestly have no idea. Why aren't we taught anything useful, like correct parenting, in school? Other than calculate how much we ought to spend per diaper, what good is mathematics? I dunno.....

But right now, it feels better that I've let it out - albeit viciously, twice over. Feels much better.

Ok, ye who shall try and rile me further, hold your horses. My hormonal make-up is turbulent. Anything and everything will cause a spark. I know, I know, I already know. It's so hard as it is.