Humour

A relative mass mailed this. At this point in time, this just seems darn funny. Maybe it's not a hormonal thing. Maybe it's just me.

"Dear Lord,

I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him;
And Patience for his moods.

Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength,
I'll beat him to death.

AMEN"

Also, by way of update, my obstetrician said to me during our usual 3 minute meet-up, "Ah! You're right on target! All's great! You're 32 weeks pregnant and you measure 32 cms from here to here (gesturing from under my breast-bone to just above my pubic bone)!!".

He then flashed me this satisfied smile. I brought my husband this time - as witness. I ain't kiddin', dear, I tell him everytime - he's supposed to be my obstetrician! He just uses this measuring tape I swear! What saved me from laughing out loud this and every other time was pure and simple suffocation. I can't lie on my back anymore - the weight of this 32 cm thing in my belly region somehow compresses my chest cavity so much - it's really just a vacuum. Sucks the breath outta me.

He also instructed me to do a tour of the hospital like NOW before I go into labour. One of those 'must do' stuff, he said. To orientate myself before I get disoriented with pain. Ha ha.

Oh, and don't call me and don't come to hospital till your contractions are 3 minutes apart, he said. And EVEN IF your water breaks, don't call me, just go straight to hospital and the nurses will know what to do. Really, you don't say. Thank God for that brief moment of asphyxiation.... else my manners woulda shown themselves, surely.

Honestly. The second I realise I'm in labour - I'm gonna get my ass in that hospital bed (kick someone else out if you're short-bedded, I don't care) and I'm gonna holler and howl till the epidural's administered. No 2 ways about it, Hosea. Who do they really think they're dealing with? Good grief.

Bloody ABC

Played the new season's Grey's anatomy backwards!
The 2nd episode of the new season got played before the 1st!
I can't believe them.
I watched the new episode backwards. Sigh. It's annoying.

Whilst I'm at it. I'm gonna annoy the rest of ya.
Grey lost her panties during the hospital prom. Alison found them in Derek's tux. But just coz they played it backwards, I saw the panties pinned up on the hospital board before I found out how it got there in the first place.

Dreams are made of these

My Belle learning to ice-skate

My Man feeling cool with his 'kung-fu' weapon (aka tree branch)

No.3 wriggling ever so gleefully every night

(darn! I can't sleep!)

In case tomorrow never comes

If I knew it would be the last time

That I'd see you fall asleep,

I would tuck you in more tightly and pray the Lord,

your soul to keep.

If I knew it would be the last time that I see you walk out the door,

I would give you a hug and kiss

and call you back for one more.

If I knew it would be the last time I'd hear your voice lifted up in praise,

I would video tape each action and word,

so I could play them back day after day.

If I knew it would be the last time, I could spare an extra minute to stop and say "I love you," instead of assuming you would KNOW I do.

If I knew it would be the last time I would be there to share your day,

well I'm sure you'll have so many more,

so I can let just this one slip away.

For surely there's always tomorrow to make up for an oversight,

and we always get a second chance to make everything just right.

There will always be another day to say "I love you,"

And certainly there's another chance to say our "Anything I can do?"

But just in case I might be wrong, and today is all I get,

I'd like to say how much I love you and I hope we never forget.

Tomorrow is not promised to anyone, young or old alike,

And today may be the last chance you get to hold your loved one tight.

So if you're waiting for tomorrow, why not do ALL it today?

For if tomorrow never comes, you'll surely regret the day,

That you didn't take that extra time for a smile, a hug, or a kiss

and you were too busy to grant someone,

what turned out to be their one last wish

So hold your loved ones close today, and whisper in their ear,

Tell them how much you love them and that you'll always hold them dear

Take time to say "I'm sorry," "Please forgive me," "Thank you," or "It's okay."

And if tomorrow never comes, you'll have no regrets about today.

The important things

My Main Man

My Angels

Quotable quotes:-

My Belle in a sleepy daze before she dozed off - "Am a dragoon - moooooo...."

[translated "I'm a dragon. Grrrrr."]

My famished Man - "I wanna eat chickentucky."

[translated "Kentucky Fried Chicken"]

We took him to Church's instead and in a conspiring whisper he said, "I dun think this is chickentucky mommy...." as Daddy queued up.

Luckily, he didn't mind it too much and chomped down 2 drumsticks anyway.

Mini Mes

My Belle's biggest word todate is "ballerina" pronounced "bah-ler-ree-nah!" and her frustrated refrain is often "oh man!"

My Man asked why Pinnochio didn't break any bones when he fell off the tree.

"But he's made of wood MOMMY! What do you meeean?!" when I absent-mindedly replied that perhaps he didn't fall from a height.

I reminded him that milk helps - gives you strong bones so you can fall from higher without breaking things (baad mama!) conveniently ignoring the Pinnochio scenario.

He chuckled, "So milk's like glue? From the mouth to the bones to fix 'em."